I note that 1) dogs are allowed in the Hut, but only downstairs.
Does the club have a policy on cats?
If so, are cats
A) allowed in the hut
if so
B) allowed upstairs
?
If the answer to A) is not “yes”, this is clear anti-feline discrimination, and the club will be hearing from my lawyers
You have a book entitled Chavs on your shelf 
It’s not even a good book. It’s by that tosser Owen Jones and I think i stole it.
I think the cottage should have a resident cat to keep those mice away! They make quite a racket in the gaps under the dorm floor 
Wi-Fi and a dishwasher Paul. Then you can have your cats.
As long as they are hypoallergenic cats of course and they are trained not to immediately jump on people who are allergic as most cats seem wont to do
Trained to love belly rubs - will that do?
The cat will be ok as long as it’s not there when I take my goldfish.
Ok well just let me know when you’re bringing the fish and I’ll make sure we go at different times
